“I just wanted to extend my heartfelt thanks to this page and this community. I’m a 17 year old girl and not a lot of people I know are ace, so I’m glad that I’m accepted and welcomed here. It’s nice to feel like I’m not alone!”
“This may seem such an odd thing to talk about. I’m a homo-romantic indifferent ace. I often find I feel disconnected from other aces. I mean, I know there are more out there who have similar expressions. But every time I come across other aces, they are almost always aro ace and sex repulsed. I only really concluded my asexuality a few months ago. Do others find it similarly difficult to find people with their shared experiences? Perhaps having that longing to sit down with another ace and say “I don’t find I have a sexual attraction to people, but I’m also perfectly fine with a sexual relationship” and hearing the response “I know exactly what you mean”? Or to find the aces who don’t have an aro romantic attraction? I guess what I mean to ask is, do others find being a romantic ace who is indifferent to sex means being lonely and alone a lot?”
“So I have appreciated the perspectives that the asexual community has exposed me to for many reasons. In particular I want to say that the humor this Facebook group provides is fantastic and really brightens my day. Thank you.”
TW: Abuse, sexually explicit
“Hi, I’m a 31 yo (former?) hetero woman. I don’t believe I’m asexual, as I have experienced attraction and used to enjoy sex prior to a couple years ago. I’ve been divorced a little over a year and I’ve been celibate almost 2 years. I think I’m just not interested anymore. My ex had erectile issues occasionally and insisted that it was my “job” to fix it, so it became more of a frustrating chore, and I wouldn’t even actually call it sex towards the end cuz he would basically just stand over me and masturbate and use my mouth. He wouldn’t even lie down with me. It felt more like abuse. I’m pretty sure I was even drugged a couple times. Anyway, I don’t date cuz I don’t want to have to deal with explaining my choice to be celibate. I also have hypothyroidism which causes little to no libido anyway. I am repulsed by the thought of anyone touching me. I’m really glad I came across the group, cuz even know I don’t fit the title, I can relate with SO MUCH that is posted.”
“Hey, I want to send a bit of inspirational message to everybody in the page, from my own personal experience.
I know many of you feel frustrated because it sometimes looks like trying to raise awareness is useless or that people turn deaf ears on us. Or maybe you’re scared about talking of asexuality on social media because you fear acephobia.
Yes, that happens, unfortunately, but I want to tell you that since I started posting about asexuality on social media I have received messages from people who needed help to figure if they were asexual and thought I could help them. And in another occasion an ace friend turned to me to talk about an episode of acephobia she had experienced.
So, if you ever feel it’s not worth it, remember awareness really helps people, that we can create a safe space for other aces. Hold on and be strong!”
“I’m so happy I found this group! I love reading everyone’s stories and looking through jokes and stuff! To know that there’s so many people thinking the same as yourself and to know that you’re not “weird” and there’s nothing wrong with you. I feel connected to everyone on this page even though I haven’t really met anyone in person. You’re all awesome! It’s only been a couple of months since I realized I was ace (probably heteroromantic, but not quite sure yet) and it has really opened up a whole new world for me. Thank you all for existing ”
“Thank you guys for making this page. I’m so glad this page exists, and I couldn’t be any more happier. I’m a 21 year old woman who finally realized I’m asexual. I never had any real life dates (never showed interest in them), have had only long distance relationships (and thankfully stopped doing them at 20), and ever since I’ve came out as asexual, I’ve gotten things like “you’re still young”. The thing of it is, I’m not young. I’m 21 with the mindset of a 60 year old who’s wise as can be. I’ve also been told that “God will give me the right person” when I don’t need anyone and I’m happier just not being in a relationship with anyone since all my ldrs failed on me. Second, what difference would it make if someone tried to fall in love with damaged goods like me? None. Also, there’s nothing wrong with me being asexual at all. I have no interest in anyone and never will.
Oh, and lets not forget I’ve been told that “but you write/make erotica”. Except its fiction and nothing more. I’m proud to be asexual and that’s that. I love this page with all my heart and couldn’t be happier.”
“I’ve never felt the urge to have sex, or even felt “attraction” to anyone. Sure I think some guys are good looking ( I’m heteroromantic) but never felt the ” I want that guy inside me” feeling like my friends often do. When I found out about asexuality i was so happy because it fit me so I thought I wasn’t broken after all. The thing is I’m sex repulsed and have no libido. When searching about asexuality, I’ve seen countless times people saying that sex repulsed has nothing to do with asexuality, or that asexuals also have desires, or even that people like me only hurt visibility because we give asexuals a bad reputation. Now I don’t know anymore what am I supposed to be or where do I belong anymore. The feeling of being broken is all back.
“i rather remain hidden and prefer not to have too much conversation as people scare me. but i’d like to thank everyone, as i now know QPR (Queer Platonic relationships) are possible and can be successful, my bestie and “permanent Roommate” is ace and aro and we always wanted that kind of meaningful relationship kinda thing without romance or bleg the other thing. either way! thank you and the community.”
“Whoever made this page – you fucking legend! I’m 23 years old and I live in Newcastle, Australia.
Asexuality is the orientation that I feel most comfortable identifying with. I have never desired any sexual relationship with anyone and for a long time I thought it was because there was something intrinsically wrong with me. I thought that if I didn’t desire sex, I was somehow not entirely human, and thus could not live a wholesome and happy life.
I have been told all the classic diatribes that asexuals often hear, like “It’s just a phase, you’ll grow up one day”, “is it a religious belief?” or “How do you know if you’ve never tried sex”. In addition, girls I have dated in the past have taken great offence when I tell them I have no sexual interest in them, even when I try and explain that I have never had sexual interest in anyone at all. This made me feel almost like I was some sort of cold and unfeeling sociopath, incapable of connecting with other human beings properly.
Once I starting researching why I am the way Pages like this comfort me, as it makes me know that there are indeed many others out who don’t experience sexual attraction. It freed me and made me realize that my lack of sexual attraction is just what makes me me, just like someone’s height, hair colour or shoe size.
I’ve been in a relationship with a girl for almost two years now and we are both open to one another about our mutual lack of sexual attraction. We often talk about how every relationship has their own elements that are completely unique to that relationship. The fact that we don’t have sexual intimacy just a part of our relationship. All the love is definitely still there. When people have the impertinence to ask us about our sex life, we tell them that it’s simply none of their business.
I’m definitely content with myself and my sexual orientation now, much of which I owe to activists like you. I’m doing my best to encourage those in my own community to show empathy for asexuality, as well as assuring others that it’s okay to feel comfortable with their sexuality. Although I have received a lot of criticism in doing so, the people who matter have been loving and accepting about it.
Thank you for all you have done and thank you for taking the time to read this message.”