From the inbox #798

TW: Acephobia

“Hello, there.
I stumbled upon this ask on tumblr and being a homoromantic/ace, I find this hurtful to read. Especially when the op say that it’s “pointless” and “shit”.
I was hoping you could post this (with the pictures) on your page because I’d like to know other aces’ take on this. Thanks so much!”

From the inbox #770

“I need to tell you people (sorry if my english is not so good, i’m Chilean) the LGBT community, or the pages I follow… they are so awful people, they discriminate Ace people, ’cause they don’t understand us. Is sad, really. It’s just my opinion but I think they should be nicer with others. We are part of LGBT too, right? Maybe I’m wrong, but is sad to know that they are like that. LGBT is a community for people with different sexual orientations, but why they are so bad with us?! They said “why is a sexual orientation if they don’t have sex?” Couldn’t they read the posts in Internet? Why don’t asks? Why are they so…. bad with us?
I speak about latino community LGBT, idk how is the english community, but mine is literally SHIT.
This is from me and my girlfriend, we are asexual and she has seen things like that too.”

Here are the replies

From the inbox #719

“I have an anonymous question I’d like posted. Is it acceptable to put your family out of your home for racist, anti LGBT+ comments, and have them living on the street again? My brother is homeless because I put him out again, over such comments.”

Here are the replies

From the inbox #707

“Hey guys! Is it possible to request a post thanking the supporters of the ace community who are a part of this group? Often times we see posts of acephobia/arophobia that receive a lot of comments that are a little hateful towards the allosexuals, which isn’t an issue at all. We all have things we like to get off our chests and it’s pretty obvious it’s, “Not all allos.”
However I think it’s important to recognize our allies for taking the time to learn about our sexual and romantic orientations. So they can become more educated and accepting and have a place to safely ask genuinely curious questions. There’s not a lot of helpful places on the internet to communicate with such a large group of ace/aro individuals and be able to learn so much about us. With all the different places on the ace spectrum and aro spectrum that are trying to have their voices heard, it’s good that our allies are here to listen and grow in knowledge of how diverse being asexual or aromantic is.”

Here are the replies

From the inbox #704

“I know this is completely out of context, and basically, it’s a pretty aphobe and arophobe comment, but I just found it and had to laugh thinking of the “asexuals are not queer, aromantics are not queer” discourse: (“The only people who are queer are the people who don’t love anybody.”
(by Rita Mae Brown)
Wanted to share that in case anyone else finds it funny. Best regards. 🙂

Here are the replies

From the inbox #678

“Good evening, I hope you’re well. I’m not sure if I’m doing this right or if this is allowed, but I have nowhere else to go…

I’m part of a facebook group that’s primary intent is to be a safe space for people in every possible facet. From sexuality to gender indentity/expression to sex work to support for survivors of abuse/assault, you name it. Since my joining, I’ve felt like it’s the safest place on the internet I’ve ever been able to express myself because the group’s mods/mins and members ensure that everyone knows they are valid.

Today, they held a pole to see if they should allow members that are ace/aro exlusionary, people that feel ace/aro individuals are NOT of the LGBTQIA+ community.

What they don’t understand is that they just casually put to a vote whether or not they should legitimize ace/aro exlusionists.

What they don’t understand is that by potentially legitimizing those people, they’ve successfully put the ace/aro community back on the chopping block, where we nervously await our fate, to see if we will ever belong, or to see if we are even recognized as real and legitimate people.

It was so hurtful and scary, to feel so… inconsequential by the one place I thought I’d be safe… Like I should just shrug off my ace mantle and pretend I’m a “prude” again. Or that I should go back to disclosing my history of sexual assault – a very horrible experience – with people so that they might back off…

I feel lost. And I just felt like you were the only group that might understand.

Thank you for letting me vent and for your wonderful page. 🙂

Here are the replies

From the inbox #651

“CW: Rape, corrective Rape, Aphobia, exclusionists, swearing, insulting, invalidation of asexuality.

This is a real all-rounder on when, where and why asexuals are FALSELY excluded and busts many aphobic arguments.
It’s full of resources once you scrolled past the aphobic reblogs.”


Here are the replies

From the inbox 602

“Warning: Rant about erasure

So, I just had a whole experience on trying to educate some people on what asexual was, whom believed there is only three sexualities and two genders.
What I received was an inane conversation containing the most amount of acephobia I have ever seen, as well as genderphobia.
Plants, single-cell organism, need the right guy, basically abstinence, a disability, a disorder, hormone imbalances, not real because it’s a choice, because its human to not to want to have sex with everything, why is there a special word for ‘I don’t like sex’, it doesn’t exist, and more.
One reply was simply a picture saying “Triggered beyond the realm of mysogny”. Yes, because asexuality is about hating women.

The worst part was that the OP deleted the comment these replies were on, only rooting in the erasure that I was trying to educate against, on the point of it being “off topic”. It was a post about ‘agefluid’, it was already on identities.

I’m sorry, I needed to say this somewhere. The absolute ignorance and stupidity of some people is astounding.”

Here are the replies