From the inbox #94

“I am soon-to-be divorced. My spouse cheated and lied and is now involved with someone else. But, losing my spouse is not what hurts the most., It’s losing the companionship. Even after the deception and betrayal, I tried to remain friends with this person, They, however, instead spit that back in my face and said many choice words and hurtful things to me. Now we don’t speak at all. So, losing the friendship was the ultimate blow in all of this. Looking back on the relationship itself, I never placed much importance on sex. Sure, it was something that was done. But, if it wasn’t, then it wouldn’t have mattered to me. What I valued most was the companionship– the snuggling, the closeness, the laughs, etc. So, yes, it does hurt that this person is with someone else now– but moreso that they are willing to share that companionship with a mere stranger than to remain friends with someone they have known since we were both children. I thought that they truly loved me or at least cared about me as a person and saw me as a living being with feelings– not an object to be thrown in the trash like it was nothing. Yes, so I am hurt. 🙁 But, I digress…. What I really eant to know now is how to move on. I am not interested in being with anyone else in the romantic sense. But, every single dating site or gathering situation has the pressures of the hook-up…everyone seems to be all about the hook-up these days. I don’t want to lead anyone on. But, how do you say “Nice to meet you, I hate sex”? to someone?? Lol! I’m joking but totally serious all at the same time here. It seems that they are no Asexual groups to meet others for platonic relationships. I really want friends in my life…but that’s it– none of this “with benefits” crap (not for nothing). So, how does someone like me find that in a world so filled with lust and primal urges that it disgusts me completely?? :/

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