From the inbox #82

“I have a rant / struggle and am in need of not help but rather advice?

I am eighteen, nearly nineteen years old and I have labeled myself asexual for nearly two years now without bringing it up much as here, topics about sexuality are rarely present or even if they were, barely ever serious. To go through and out high-school was not an incredibly hard task for me as I still experienced (and still do) romantic attraction, had a crush and so on and people didn’t really say much about it, except for those who wanted to bring their sexual activity in other conversations and use it as a stepping stone with their egos in conversations with people who are admittedly not interested.

However, high-school passed and I began spending more time at home (searching for jobs and so on) and actually had a tad bit more conversations with my mother during that time & they were conversations in which she openly spoke of the years to come when I’d bring her a grandchild, a wife and even told me what my wife could and couldn’t look like– somewhat idiotic in my opinion, but that aside.

I eventually got tired of such comments and while not caring at all about what people classify me as & fully aware of what could happen in terms of people’s opinions about me, I came out to her.

Now she did not know what asexual meant. She asked me if I was gay at first, which I explained that is not the case and that I was simply not allured by the thoughts of sex, at all. She labeled that as abnormal & in need of psychiatric treatment but I quite frankly told her to mind her own business…

But my problem lies here. She is in /denial?/ of my asexuality and keeps bringing topics up about grandchildren, my potential non-existent future wife and so on and the moment I bring the “A BOMB” to her, she rolls her eyes – a motion which I recognize from her as “it’s a phase”…

So, any advice about how I can convince her it is actually NOT a phase?”

Here are the replies.