From the inbox #37

“I’m hoping you can help answer a question for me. I am so happy that I have found this page that offers support. I’m confused about my sexuality, as all the definitions on the sexuality spectrum don’t really pinpoint me. Sex and sexual conversation has always made me uneasy. As as teen and young adult, I never understood how my friends could fantasize over a guy. I was attractive, and constantly strived to make myself less attractive to males. I avoided any and all sexual advances- and now know that I was likely demi?
I am now 40, “hetero”, married for 8 yrs- female. Had interest in sex initially with husband, But now hate sex, and any and all touching- including hugs-by anyone. I am repulsed by the idea of sex altogether, and I am very angry that it is part of my marriage. My husband doesn’t understand-and doesn’t respect my boundaries (I agree it’s unfair to him). I think I may be grey, and it’s extremely difficult to be married to a sexually driven male (he would like sex 4-5 times a week). Sorry for the long message. I’m having trouble identifying my sexuality, and I just want to be able to read and understand more about myself, but haven’t found a word that identifies how I feel. I really need more knowledge so hopefully, I can make compromises in my marriage- or realize that I can no longer be in a marriage with a sexually driven male. Thanks for the help.”

Here are the replies.