From the inbox #237

“Hi! I would like to share my story with you guys, or at least as much as there is currently. I’d also like to remain anonymous, as I’m not out to my family really.
I am an agender(and I guess technically transfeminine, as I use the feminine pronouns that I have used since birth) asexual who just recently realized that I was asexual, and who is in a polyamorous relationship.
From what I’ve found online, many allosexual people seem to think that polyamory and asexuality are complete opposites, when that isn’t the case.
Polyamory means “many loves”, and while sex is part of it, it’s not the main thing like some assume.
For us, our relationship is this:
My boyfriend is the polyamorous one, and his other girlfriend and I are monogamous. We don’t have any romantic or sexual interaction with each other, but we both interact with our boyfriend. She helps me raise the two kids I’ve had with our boyfriend, and I help her with whatever she needs help with, as long as it’s not sexual.
Not many people in our families know that we’re in a poly, and even less know that I’m asexual. And that’s fine. As the world (hopefully) becomes more open to things, maybe then I’ll find a reason to tell them. Until then, I’m perfectly fine with letting my family and most of my friends assume that I am a binary, sometimes sexual person, because honestly? What I do behind closed doors is none of their business. As long as my kids are cared for and happy, and I’m happy, that’s all that should matter, right?”

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