From the inbox #232

TW: Abuse

“So, about 10 months ago, I broke up with the person I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with. We were together for a year, but a few months before things started to take a turn for the worst, and I started to pick up a change in her behaviour towards me. I knew she had feelings for someone else, but would never admit to them and I feared she was cheating on me; after her spending so much time with this specific person, and going out clubbing with them. She was emotionally and sexually abusive towards me and since exiting the relationship I’ve been suffering PTSD like symptoms. She became very abusive and harassing after I ended things, she would text me pretending to be her new girlfriend and say how much better she was in bed, and they would always be abusive towards the sexual sides of things. The thought of sex scares me, and almost reminds me of how weak I am. I came out as asexual in February because I felt it was more easier to give myself a label than have to explain the trauma she has caused me. I have recently came out as trans (female to male) and am more distressed about the idea of sex, because within relationships males are the more dominant, and she would constantly tell me I’m not dominant enough.
I was wondering whether anybody else has been through this or similar and has any advice.”

Here are the replies