From the inbox #227

“Hey, so… here’s my deal… I’ve been on the fence about identifying as ace for a long time because I kind of feel like a fraud. (I know labels aren’t for everyone but personally I would like to have one.) I feel like I am not quite asexual because, even though I’m a 22 year old virgin (female), I sometimes want to try sex but I honestly feel like that’s only because I need to know if I’m missing out. To elaborate, the concept of sex seems great and desirable but I am fairly certain I wouldn’t enjoy myself because I don’t like being touched and I highly doubt my anxiety would allow anything of the sort. Sooooo I don’t know where that leaves me. I’m not sure if I’ve ever felt real sexual attraction because I have a hard time differentiating between that and aesthetic attraction. It is so rare for me to be interested in someone, and when I find out that the person reciprocates my feelings, I immediately lose mine and am kind of repulsed. It is a MADDENING feeling because I feel really lonely and I want to be happy with someone but I feel like no one is ever the right person. I feel like such a black sheep because I never have relationships to report. Can anyone shed any light on this?”

Here are the replies