From the inbox #15

“Question.
I dunno if I’m ace or not.
I certainly used to feel attraction but in the last year it’s just dropped off. Desire to date, hook up, all gone. I don’t even like porn anymore. Masturbation just feels like a waste function like farting rather than fun. But I do have a crush or two which leads me to think I might be demi or grey. My mindset has been damn the labels and just feel what I feel, but I a) do not want to use an ace label when inaccurate because it would diminish the term for actual aces and b) want to use a label if I am in fact on the gradient in the interest of awareness. What do? Wait it out to see if my attraction is emotional/aesthetic or actually sexual in some regard? Use something like gray or demi because it’s accurate for how I’ve been feeling? How do I address my feeling sexual attraction in years past? Am I just in a rut or does this actually happen where people gradually shift from allo to ace? I don’t know anything.”

Here are the replies.