“I am a high school teacher who is asexual and I have a wonderful girlfriend. I live in a country where gay sex is still criminalised and where sex education in the schools means promoting only heterosexual marriage. While there is a sizeable queer community and many people, especially the youth, are accepting of us, official attitudes have been slow to change.
While giving a lecture yesterday, a student asked me point blank in front of the entire class if I was gay. I gave the most PC answer I could (ie. “is that an appropriate question to ask your teacher”). Whereupon she immediately asked if I was asexual. When I gave the same reply, the student then went on to protest that it was perfectly OK to be asexual and nothing to be ashamed of. Even when her classmates told her that what she was asking was not cool, she still persisted. I eventually managed to distract them with some jokes and the lecture went on.
I’m now wondering if I should have any follow up response to this student or if I should let the matter rest so as not to draw further attention. I did ask her classmate who is openly queer as well to explain nicely and in private to her that she really shouldn’t ask questions that might get me into trouble at work. I also don’t want to report this to her homeroom tutor as I feel the question was curious rather than malicious. I would also rather not have colleagues questioning if I am queer. Any advice would be much appreciated!
(If it helps, I can visually pass as cis-het, though I’ve been told that anyone with half a functioning gaydar would at least be able to tell that I am not straight.)”
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