From the inbox #1184

“i’m a little confused about whether or not i’m ace to some degree or another. i’m non binary and amab so i was socialized to see sex as of primary importance but as i’ve become more conscious of my socialization i’ve gotten really frustrated because it seems like i like the idea of sex in my head more than actually having it. it’s like, sort of entertaining because i’m good at it but not really enjoyable and i always end up feeling horrible and drained afterwards. even during i start to feel like “why did i want this so badly until i got it?” i’ve felt demi/grey in the past but i always felt like because i fantasize and sometimes hook up with people i’m not emotionally connected to that i couldn’t be right about that. but now i sort of feel like the enjoyment is in my head and maybe it is that i’m missing that connection. i don’t know, i’m just generally pretty confused and wanted to reach out for some feedback
i’m also struggling because i’ve found porn etc to be really unhealthy for me – like, masturbation makes me feel just as bad if not worse than sex. so idk what to do”

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