Hello. Thank you for agreeing to do an interview with me. What should I call you?
Tell me about yourself.
Hi! I’m Laur. I’m a 28 year old queer panromantic asexual. I’m bipolar and have depression and anxiety. I like extreme stuff. Pretty much just a tomboy.
Has your ace identity ever had an impact on your dating life?
Not at all actually! He’s completely fine with my asexuality. He knew of asexuality before we met but the way I acted when we first met, he didn’t know I was asexual.
What are things you want and don’t want in a relationship?
The things I want are just to be kissed, touched, hugged, being cuddled/snuggled with. The things I don’t want are just sex really.
What about your current partner(s)? What is/are their label(s)?
My current partner is straight. But very active in learning more about the community and my asexuality.
What kind of relationship do you have? Does that work for (both/all of) you?
We have a romantic one. We both are hopeless romantics and it’s a nice change than my last one.
What role does sex play in your relationship?
We don’t have it. He understands that I don’t want it but I have thought about it. Unless we can get past the possible pregnancy part, I might try it. But I’m not really sure.
What about intimacy? What’s intimacy for you and your partner(s)?
Intimacy to us is just being in each other’s arms. Kissing each other, maybe some sexual touching and things. Nothing in our relationship has been rushed intimately.
How is your relationship perceived by others?
Well, our friends and family know this isn’t a straight relationship. I came out on Facebook as queer on Coming Out Day. But most already knew that I was ace. Strangers might think we’re straight. I’m not sure though. But people can think what they want about how our relationship is looked as.
What about past relationships?
I came out to my ex of 4 years. It wasn’t a good one towards the end of it. My identity was no problem for them. I haven’t had any problem with being ace in any relationship since none of it was ever sexual.